Growing up, I was a very busy child. My mother put me in everything, from soccer to cheerleading to music class. That being said, in eighth grade, I ended up trying out for the step team since I missed cheerleading tryouts that year. My coach always said, ” Women should be seen before they are heard.” The ancient saying is, ” Women should be seen and not heard,” but that is another post for another day. Being a mysterious woman has many benefits.
What does it mean to be a mysterious woman?
When I say the word mysterious, what comes to mind? After reading this post, you will understand specific rules if you aspire to be more mysterious. These rules can help with dating, making new friends, and interacting with new business partners. Whether you are married, single, or somewhere in between, being mysterious can always help and draw people in.
Traits of a Mysterious Woman:
Queen Esther, one of the most influential women, shows some of these traits in the Book of Esther.
Rule 1: Do not overshare
Oversharing your business can be a dangerous game, especially if you are a single woman looking to enter a relationship. I am sure you have heard other girls share that they told prospective men how they were done wrong, and those men ended up doing the same or sometimes worse. From here on out, any man you talk to or date should only know a little about your past relationships. To them, you were treated like a queen, or you left.
The same goes for friendships. When making friends, it is important not to bad-mouth previous friends. It is never a good look. Oversharing is sometimes a defense mechanism for wanting to lay everything out on the table to see if others want to move forward. If you are sharing too much too soon you can scare others away.
In dating, men fall in love differently than women. Women’s mysteriousness usually draws a healed and healthy man in.
Beware, there is a fine line between mysterious and secretive.
Rule 2: Listen more than you speak
My dad always said we have two ears and one mouth because we were made to hear others more than talk about ourselves. I used to think it was a tactic for me not to express myself as a child, but now that I am older, I see the benefit of active listening. When you actively listen to others, you will find out exactly what type of people you are around by listening to them speak.
Dating tip: Allow the man to talk more and listen to what he says, how he speaks of others, and what he talks about around his friends. You will find there is little need to ask many questions.
Active listening is a skill that every adult should have but does not.
Check out some of these articles to learn more about actively listening
Rule 3: Think before you speak
Only some people and everything deserve a response. Thinking before you speak and acting impulsively have much to do with self-control and emotional intelligence. In my last podcast episode, ‘Standing on Business,’ I shared how important it is to only react to some things. There is power in the tongue; not only is it important to speak at the correct time, but mysterious women understand the power of their words.
That is not to say that your emotions will not overtake you in some situations, but it is essential to understand your triggers and to find ways to calm down whenever you are in difficult situations.
Rule 4: Check your appearance
I do not want to say standing out is a bad thing. It might be inevitable depending on where you are, who you are, and who you are around. However, when you are out at events, can you ensure you dress appropriately? If there is a dress code, are you following it? Mysterious women do not purposefully stand out to bring attention to themselves; they understand that attention comes naturally. I want to point out that dressing applies changes depending on the setting, but always be mindful of your outer appearance.
Shop the post for things I feel every woman should own
Rule 5: Very observant
Have you ever heard the saying, keep your head on a swivel? As women, we often have to watch out for danger more than men, simply because men naturally do not see us as a physical sense of threat. It is sad to say, but when we are alone and even with our friends, we must be diligent regarding our safety. As an adult and making more friends in a new city, I realize some women are not as observant as they should be. Mysterious women are not distracted by what is going on around them. Scan your environment, behind you, beside you, and the nonverbal social cues people actively show.
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